We’ve got another edition of WWE Raw here this evening and that means another recap! I’m Jordan Huie aka the One Zeel One and as always here at 1Z1 Pro Wrestling, I’ll be giving the live play-by-play on the show as it airs! So watch this space!
Randy Orton opens the show and five minutes later he’s made it to the ring. He says eight days ago he became a world champion and proved that he’s the best of the best but no. That doesn’t do him any justice. He says he proved eight days ago that he is the best period. Better than Edge, the Undertaker, Shawn Michaels, John Cena and most certainly better than Drew McIntyre.
He says he proved that he is better than everyone in the locker room who have been lying to themselves, saying he was handed things. That Triple H protected him earlier in his career, that management chose him but they’re mistaken. The reason that he’s in this position is because he is the best. He showed that he is no longer the Legend Killer, he is now simply a legend. As he keeps going on like this, Alexa Bliss interrupts him.
She just kinda stands in the ring for a while, it’s a little awkward. Orton eventually asks “Where is he?” Alexa raises her hands to her chin, one glove says “Play” and the other says “Pain”. She lowers the “Play” hand and says He could be… here! The Fiend’s screech starts playing. Orton is looking for him, but instead Drew McIntyre is there with a Claymore! Drew says he wants his rematch. He leaves, but in comes the Miz and John Morrison! Miz wants the cash-in, and they start to announce it but McIntyre goes back in and wipes them out. He deposits Miz, then tosses Morrison over the top rope onto him! McIntyre tells him that nobody is taking the gold from Orton except for McIntyre.
Miz and Morrison are furious about McIntyre’s interference. Miz says Drew is a petty, petulant child, says because he can’t have his way no one else can have theirs. Tells him to get over it. Morrison repeatedly adds “FACT” to everything he says. He then adds that McIntyre made a big mistake messing with twice-in-a-lifetime history. They want a handicap match with McIntyre if he has the stones.
Elias is in the ring on a seat and he be strumming. He says there comes a time when everyone has to realize the truth and Jeff Hardy had this months ago. Says he tried to end his career because he realized that it had surpassed his, proven by his going to #1 on iTunes. Says when he first heard about the Guitar-On-A-Pole match he said it was crazy, he makes hit after hit with this thing. But he realized that when he took it across Jeff’s back it may be his greatest hit ever. He then starts to sing “Amen” again but Jeff Hardy’s music cuts it off quick.
Guitar-On-A-Pole: Elias vs. Jeff Hardy
They go to battle quick, Elias with a shoulder block. Big body slam and Jeff ends up on the outside, Elias starts to climb for the guitar but Jeff grabs his ankle and pulls him to the floor. He leaps off the steps for a Poetry In Motion style dive that sends him into the barricade! Jeff starts the climb now but Elias tosses his stool into Hardy’s face (not like that, Jeff only does piss angles) and Jeff falls to the floor before the commercial break.
We come back to see Elias stomping Jeff in a corner. He pulls him up, whip for a back elbow. He goes for a suplex but Jeff escapes behind him, Elias grabs his leg but Jeff gets him with a Dragon Whip. He chops him on the way up. Knocks him to his hands and knees. Jeff wants a Twist of Fate, Elias shoves him away, big high knee drops Hardy! Elias goes for the guitar but Jeff trips him facefirst onto the buckle! Jeff with a buncha blows, Elias whips him but eats a clothesline. Double Leg into a Legal Low Blow, Basement Dropkick into an Elbow Drop.
Elias goes for the guitar again and Jeff grabs him. Electric Chair takes him to the mat! Jeff goes up again, and this time he manages to grab the guitar. He leaps off the top rope to smash it over his back! Covers him afterward and that is that.
Winner: Jeff Hardy
You can’t really expect Pole matches to be all that special but it’s fine for what it was.
Tag champs will be defending against fellow Survivor Series teammates Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke, and of course Lana is the world’s dumbest person and needs to be put through the table again so she also comes out to ringside before the bell.
WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Shayna Baszler & Nia Jax (c) vs. Mandy Rose & Dana Brooke
Mandy starts with Nia, she surprises her with a Black Widow-esque hold, Nia is able to take her down but Dana tags in, takes her down for a big Handspring Moonsault, Shayna has to break it up. Shayna and Mandy tag in, Baszler with a Gutwrench Suplex. Mandy with a big right hand and tags Brooke back in, series of clotheslines.
Dana with a Handspring Back Elbow into a Bulldog, Mandy with a running dropkick to take out Nia as Dana pins for a nearfall! Inside cradle gets another close one. She throws Shayna to the outside, she grabs Lana for some reason, Dana with a Baseball Slide. Shayna gets her in a Kirifuda Clutch, Lana hops up onto the apron for the distraction. Dana rolls her up, ref is distracted by Lana but eventually it gets a nearfall, Dana gets sent into Lana, pulled into the Kirifuda Clutch for the win.
Winners: Shayna Baszler & Nia Jax
Things are tense afterwards but we decide to just cut away before they go for the table spot this time, wise.
Randy Orton is backstage. He says he finds it amusing that some people forget how easy it is for the hunters to become the hunted. Thinks Drew McIntyre needs a reminder and that will come sooner than later in the form of the three most dangerous letters in Sports Entertainment: RKO.
R-Truth comes out and is asked why he would accept a match against Bobby Lashley. Truth says he’s the Bobby Lashley who puts people in Nelson from the Simpsons. No, he came here for his favorite water boy Bobby Boucher who he wants to sign his water bottle, my God what a dated reference.
WWE United States Champion Bobby Lashley vs. WWE 24/7 Champion R-Truth (Non-title)
Truth says they’re both champions but it’s non-title and there’s no need for anybody to get hurt. So he lays out and says he’ll let him pin him like a real chickenshit babyface. Bobby is not happy about this. Truth asks if this is about the Instagram posts, just pin him. Instead Lashley grabs him by the throat but Truth with an upkick! He goes after him but gets clipped with a huge Spear. Full Nelson, Hurt Lock, Full Lash whatever is in and Truth is out.
Winner: Bobby Lashley
Aight. Afterwards Drew Gulak comes out to try and pin R-Truth but for some reason Lashley doesn’t want him to so he attacks him, hits the Dominator and puts him in the Hurt Lock. And then he dumps him onto Truth anyway and he gets the three count, becoming champion in his sleep. Aight. And then Lashley comes back into the ring whilst both guys are totally out. Just… to stand tall and let his theme start again instead of Gulak’s. And then he leaves again. Aight.
Lucha House Party psyching themselves up, but then they run into the waist of the Associate. AJ asks if there’s a problem. They’re scared chickenshit babyfaces and say no, they were gonna go the other way.
Nia Jax is asked about Lana. She says not to say her name in her presence. She says Lana claims to be a fighter, she wants to give her the opportunity. Says by the end of the night, she’ll be off the team – in fact she’ll take it a step further and end her career. Little close to home to have Nia making that accusation don’t you think?
AJ Styles and the Associate come out. AJ again appoints himself the captain of Survivor Series, like he didn’t already say this. He claims to have intangibles for days. The captain of the best of the best should be THE very best! So as his first order as team captain he should get that rally cry going, introducing HIS team, starting with Sheamus. Then Keith Lee. He tells them to listen, there’s a reason he gathered them out here, because they’re the best of the best and their success is his success. He doesn’t care who they have to go through on Team SmackDown. Jey Uso, Kevin Owens, Rey or Dominik, he doesn’t even care if it’s Angie!
Keith interrupts him and says on the contrary, he doesn’t believe either of them ever agreed to call him captain and if he thinks their sizable friend is enough to intimidate him into it, he should think twice. AJ chalks this up to inexperience, asks Sheamus to help him out. But Sheamus actually agrees with Lee. Says before he decided to step up from the minor leagues to the big leagues he’s been running rampant for years. And he might have Lurch here taking his orders but he will never take orders from AJ. Styles says it’s Captain AJ!
AJ tries to talk them into what this win would do for his legacy but Braun Strowman interrupts. He says the only thing this team needs are these hands because he doesn’t care who they face, Monday Night Raw has the Monster on it’s team. Lee says all of them have qualified, Mr. Monster must do the same thing. Strowman says his qualifications are that he has the record for most eliminations in a single Survivor Series match and has been on the winning side of 12 of them by his math and he beat Lee clean. Says he should not only be on the team but be Team Captain.
Adam Pearce comes out and says he would love to have Strowman on the team. But he can’t find anybody who wants to face him in a qualifier! Lee is upset about Strowman claiming to have won “clean”, wants to face him. Sheamus says Lee has been here for five minutes, he can’t call for his own matches. Sheamus wants it instead. AJ suggests a triple threat match between the bruisers and if Braun wins, he’s in. Pearce makes it official and that match is next.
Keith Lee vs. Sheamus vs. Braun Strowman
They go to battle, Strowman clotheslines Sheamus out of the ring. Hoists Lee up for the Powerslam but Lee evades, Pounce sends him to the floor! Sheamus attacks Lee from behind. Forearm to the face, whip, Lee reverses for a back elbow. Strowman takes Sheamus out of the ring and they brawl, Keith Lee with a tope wipes them out and he seems to land on his head on the apron on the way down but he pops up anyway!
Now Sheamus is grinding Lee’s face into the apron. They fight near the announce table, Lee takes over with a series of blows. Strowman with his freight train move takes them both down and Lee bounces off the announce table. Strowman strips the table down, double goozle! He wants a double chokeslam but they block it. Lee and Sheamus send Braun into the steps! Sheamus and Keith take the steps up and nail Strowman with it, sending him flying over the table! Sheamus then posts Lee!
Sheamus takes Lee into the ring. Ten Beats of the Bowery. Grabs his head, wants to rake his eyes it looks like but Lee grabs his wrist, pulls him out of the ring and tosses him into the barricade! Takes him across the ring, Sheamus is on Lee’s back when Strowman rushes up with a crossbody that takes all three through the barricade! Commercial break. We come back with Sheamus in a head and arm lock in the middle of the ring.
Keith fights his way to his feet, knocks him away, Grizzly Magnum chop, then Strowman in the ring knocks them both around, Biel Toss to Sheamus, corner clothesline and another biel. Sheamus side steps a corner charge, White Noise for a nearfall! Sheamus goes up top but Keith stops him with a goozle. Sheamus rakes the eyes to knock him away but Strowman clipping him now. He goes up there with him, headbutt, hooks for a superplex, Lee sneaks in for the Electric Chair to Strowman, Tower Spot!
Strowman wants a low blow to Lee but he blocks it. Takes it to him, Crossbody for a 2 count. Lee wants a Powerslam, Strowman escapes but Sheamus low bridges him to the outside, Pullover Shoulder Block to Lee! Hits the ropes, but Lee stops him with an Overhead Belly To Belly! Wants another, Sheamus headbutts his way free, Pump Knee for a nearfall! Sheamus wants a Brogue, Strowman takes him out of the ring though. But Lee gets him with a big lariat for a nearfall! Looking for the Spirit Bomb but Sheamus with a Brogue Kick takes Lee down, Strowman hoists him up for the not-really-Running Powerslam for the win.
Winner: Braun Strowman
Meaty big boy battle, good stuff.
AJ enters the ring. He wants everybody to come together and “shake it up” which means handshakes I guess. Strowman says he doesn’t like Lee and he knows he doesn’t like him but they need to put their differences aside and win at Survivor Series. Lee agrees and they do indeed shake! He asks Sheamus to do the same. Sheamus is salty over how the match ended, exchanging yells as AJ tries to calm them down. Strowman demands he shake his hand like a man.
Sheamus smacks his hand away, comes in for one of the more surprising bro hugs I’ve ever seen. AJ applauds this but as Strowman turns away, Sheamus gets him with a Brogue Kick! Lee proceeds to Pounce Sheamus outside, and AJ dropkicks Lee to the floor too before freaking out about why they can’t just get along.
Angel Garza tells the WWE Universe that they probably feel like they’re far apart, but when they feel when they see him is very real. The butterflies in your stomach, you don’t have to be embarrassed because he feels the same way. He knows you’re out there with those brilliant eyes, that irrestiable smile, this rose goes to you. Okay…?
Drew McIntyre backstage says he knows Orton won’t give him a rematch but he’ll be on him until he has no choice. Mentions what a great match McIntyre vs. Reigns would be. As for the Handicap match, he promises Claymores for all.
Now it’s time for the Firefly Funhouse. Bray says today is dedicated to the three most important letters in WWE. R-K-O! Abby says after what he did to us, Randy can go f*ck himself. Alexa brings up the Swear Jar and Abby says she can f*ck herself too. Bray says that’s 25 cents now! But she does bring up a valid point. Randy Orton was once a very, very bad man. We see some footage of their old feud. Bray says that’s in the past! Ashes to ashes, he was able to create a brand new world from those ashes!
A world where the fun will never- he freezes as he hears a woman scream and we see the video of Orton burning down Abigail’s house. Bray says unfortunately it can’t be that simple. HE never forgets. Alexa wants Bray’s help with a little trick she’s working on. Bray puts his Heal hand to her face. She cuts to having a devil face and blood seems to drip from her mouth. Bray is shocked and says “Holy Sh*t”!
Nia and Shayna come out, Lacey Evans and Billie Kay are pleased to know Lana will be out as they’ll have a shot to take her spot in the Survivor Series match. Shayna is already stripping the table down. Lana in a promo says tonight she’s turning the tables on Nia Jax.
Nia Jax vs. Lana
Nia drives her into the turnbuckles. Lana sends kicks but Nia no sells, drives her in the middle buckle. She calls her a pathetic piece of crap. Biel toss. Nia pulls her up and messes with her. Lana with some roundhouse kicks, Nia stops her with a clothesline. Pins lackadaisically, then pulls her up before the 3. Lana with some body shots but Nia brings her up, headbutt drops her. Nia is taunting her as she pulls her to her knees, says this is what she wants, another headbutt. Cover, she pulls her up before 3 again. Big bodyslam. Kicks her around the ring. Pulls her up, Samoan Drop for the win.
Winner: Nia Jax
That was pretty sad.
And then afterwards Nia and Shayna start to leave but then remember they didn’t put her through a table yet. Shayna goes into the ring, pulls Lana up and deposits her from the ring. Nia pulls her up, Lana still trying to fight but Nia sends her into the barricade and keeps yelling about how pathetic she is and how she doesn’t deserve to be in the ring with her. She hoists her onto her shoulders aaaaaaaaaand goes through the announce table for the seventh time.
Hurt Business are out to the ring. MVP says we’ve seen the Almighty Bobby Lashley absolutely decimate R-Truth, to get across that he’s already beaten a champion. Cedric says if Sami Zayn is still IC Champ by Survivor Series, Lashley will prove that he’s the best. Lashley says he hard Sami running his mouth but he will put his ass to sleep.
MVP says that brings them to tonight’s business. The Hurt Business have lived up to their business arrangement with WWE, they took care of the Retribution problem that WWE had no answer for and it’s time to collect payment. And they will collect their payment in the form of gold, with Cedric and Shelton challenging for the tag titles. New Day have had their time but it’s theirs now.
New Day comes to the stage. Xavier says he’s a big fan of Bobby Lashley, in fact he once got in trouble for staying up too late watching him, he was supposed to be studying for a test to go from 5th grade to 6th grade. Kofi says they’ve all been here a long time doing great things – except Cedric but he’s sure that he will – but that also describes the New Day. Kofi points out that he’s held more titles than all of them combined. Tag Team, US, IC and even the one title that the Almighty Bob Lashley couldn’t get his hands on, the WWE World Heavyweight Championship!
MVP says he was actually pretty proud of that historic championship win. But then Lashley beat him in eight seconds. He bets Bobby could beat him even quicker. Kofi says he didn’t know their name meant he hurt feelings! Kofi says it’s funny they mention eight seconds because according to Lana, that’s about all the time that Bobby can last for! MVP says that’s the problem with them, they’re all about jokes.
But Hurt Business are all business. Assures them that they do no want to dance with them. He happens to know for an absolute fact that Shelton and Cedric look forward to two-stepping on their faces as they take the titles. Xavier asks if they think they can beat the ten time – is it ten or nine? They admit there’s confusion there but let’s say ten. Xavier excitedly says “We beat the Dudleys”! Xavier calls them another failed 2020 internet start-up! The only profits they’re worried about are the Street Profits because they will face them at Survivor Series! Because New Day Rocks.
That was definitely filling time, but a nice promo battle regardless.
WWE Raw Tag Team Champions The New Day vs. Shelton Benjamin & Cedric Alexander (Non-title)
Xavier and Cedric are starting as we come back from break. Woods with a Delayed Vertical Suplex for a 1 count. Tag to Kofi, double chop, kicks to the back of the legs, double bulldog for a 1 count. Cedric scrambles to his corner, tag to Shelton. Benjamin with a whip, back elbow. Power whip to the corner! Benjamin with a big boot for a 2 count. Cedric tags in, beats him around. Wants a monkey flip but Kofi lands on his feet and starts twerking. Cedric charges but Kofi takes him over, gets a Monkey Flip of his own!
Cedric gets mad, charges in and gets a series of forearms in the corner. Takes him into the ropes, chop, whip, Kofi reverses with a roll-up, Cedric rolls through but Kofi with a dropkick! Simultags, Xavier clips Cedric on the apron, spinning heel kick to Benjamin! He throws him to the apron, forearm. Cedric comes up from behind, Xavier throws him into him to drape him on the middle rope and also knock Benjamin to the floor. Xavier with a slick half senton on the back of Cedric leading to a Baseball Slide to Shelton! But on his way back in he gets clipped, they take him outside and throw him into the barricade!
They try to isolate him inside the ring now. Xavier is fighting back, he slides under Cedric’s legs to try and get a tag but Cedric with a thrust kick to the face stops that! Commercial break. We come back to see Xavier hit a Jawbreaker on Benjamin, enziguri drops him. Kofi trying to rally for the hot tag, Xavier makes the tag while they’re in split-screen haha, Kofi with the Hot Tag stuff, flying clothesline on Cedric into the Boom Drop prefixed with MVP’s ballin’ taunt just to mess with him.
Kofi with a Trouble In Paradise but Cedric ducks it, Kofi with the boots up off a charge, top rope headscissor! Leaps at him for a Single Leg Footstomp to the chest and Cedric explodes on the sell, nearfall! Cedric counters the SOS into the Falcon Arrow for a nearfall! Rolls him to the corner, tag to Shelton, they look for a double team but Kofi knocks Shelton away, avoids the Neuralizer and deposits Cedric. Tag to Woods who comes in with the Springboard Rolling Flatliner for a nearfall. Xavier is stomping SHelton but gets dropped with a Spinebuster for a nearfall!
Woods surprises Shelton with a DDT outta nowhere for a nearfall, Cedric breaks it up! Kofi deposits Cedric, runs at Shelton but he gets Pancaked! Xavier with a big kick, Cedric with the blind tag, Neuralizer from Cedric, Paydirt from Benjamin and there’s the win!
Winners: The Hurt Business
Awesome match, which I totally thought was for the tag titles this whole time until it ended. Honestly it made perfect sense to me that they’d just give them the title shot after they beat Retribution over and over, that being the payment followed well for me. But I guess not.
Nikki Cross meets up with Alexa Bliss, tries to talk some sense into her but she won’t even look at her. Eventually she turns her around but is spooked by her scary face.
Ricochet vs. Tucker
In his first match since his turn, Tucker has no entrance. But before the bell, out comes Ali down to ringside, Ricochet is distracted. But the bell sounds, Ricochet ducks a lock-up, gets some shots in but Tucker with a shoulder block. Ali gets onto the announce desk. Tucker with a Double Arm Hook Belly To Belly, Riocochet tries to land on his feet, doesn’t quite manage it but he does roll to his feet for a superkick, Recoil and that is that.
Ric celebrates until the Retribution music hits and they swarm the ring. They send Ricochet out of the ring, then swarm in on Tucker. Double whip into a double big boot from Mace and T-Bar. Ali sends Slapjack out to deal with Ricochet, he throws him into the ring. Retribution has him surrounded. Ric starts fighting but he’s very outnumbered and he gets pummeled in the corner. They destroy him as well and Ali stands tall, basically nothing accomplished.
Sheamus meets up with McIntyre backstage. He wants Drew to Claymore Miz back to Hollywood and shove the contract down Morrison’s throat. They bump forearms, evidently they’re long-time friends. They will most certainly feud later.
Handicap: Drew McIntyre vs. The Miz & John Morrison
Morrison starts, leg kicks, Drew with a front facelock, takes him to the apron. Morrison ducks to the floor to avoid a shot, Miz with a mild distraction, Morrison with a Hot Shot. Comes back in but gets dropped with a back hand. Takes him to the corner, knife edge chop! Whip, Miz blind tags in and batters McIntyre into the corner. Drew reverses and takes him to the corner for a thunderous chop. Stomps him into the buckle. Morrison tags himself right as Miz gets tossed with a suplex.
Drew suplexes Morrison into the ring, Miz with a chopblock, Morrison with a knee drive to the face, 1 count. Miz tags in, Double Team Gutbuster! Miz looks for a running kick but Drew catches it, blade chop drops him and he’s in agony. Sidestep sends McIntyre to the outside, tag to Morrison. Drew just nopes a Baseball Slide from Miz, catches a kick from Morrison but he trips him onto the apron, pulls him off – Inverted Alabama Slam sends Morrison onto Miz! Commercial break.
Morrison with a Jawbreaker on his way up. Tag to Miz, big boot, tags right back out. They gang up and throw McIntyre shoulderfirst into the post! Quick tags as they grind on McIntyre on the outside. Mizline back in the ring, Morrison with a Springboard Corkscrew Splash for another 1 count! Morrison with a kick to the head, side headlock. Drew fights his way up, snapmare. Morrison with a boot up off a charge, looking for Starship Pain but McIntyre crotches him!
Drew goes up there with him, beats of the bowery to Morrison! And now a Back Superplex attempted but Morrison crotches him in return now. Morrison takes him into the Tree of Woe. But McIntyre with a Spider Suplex – Morrison BARELY avoids landing on his head! Tag to Miz, McIntyre with a series of shots, huge Overhead Belly To Bellies, Neckbreaker, kip-up! Goes for the Future Shock DDT, Miz breaks it for an arm drag but eats a Spinebuster, Morrison breaks up the pin with an elbow drop! Morrison tags in, superkick, Moonlight Drive for a nearfall!
Miz blind tags in, Morrison goes for a Springboard but gets taken to the outside, Miz with a Skull Crushing Finale, the finisher that’s been kicked out of on TV more than any other in history most likely, and indeed McIntyre kicks out at 2. Miz with some It Kicks. Drew ducks a shot, throws him into Morrison, Future Shock DDT! Heels powder, McIntyre with a tope onto both! Throws Miz into the ring, stalks, Claymore and that is that.
Winner: Drew McIntyre
I actually expected the finish to be him simultaneously Claymoring the both of them. He’s got two feet, why not? But anyway a pretty well done handicap match, it’s exactly how you book a monster face. Afterwards, Orton materializes with an RKO! But just as he hoists the title up we hear the Fiend laugh and growl “LET ME IN” and it cuts away, this was really a filler episode for the most part.