WWE Raw Recap time and my computer is fighting against me today so I’m very late, let’s get to it!
Bobby Lashley and MVP open the show. MVP talks about how Bobby finally had the chance to take the WWE Championship and Bobby finishes by saying that he did it. He did what he said he’d do, wasn’t given anything, had to fight for the WWE Championship. He did it by destroying Drew McIntyre at the Elimination Chamber and he will do the same in the main event of WrestleMania.
The Miz and John Morrison interrupt. Miz says he should be preparing for his match with McIntyre but he gives props to his speech. It wasn’t really that good a speech. They say they’re all in on the Almighty Era, it’s so powerful! Miz says he was so proud to share the ring with him, it was an honor. But their budding rivalry isn’t over, it’s just getting started! All the biggest in history had showdowns at WrestleMania! They make ridiculous comparisons to Andre vs. Hogan, Bret vs. Shawn and Stone Cold vs. The Rock. They do a SCSA impression as they ask for a hell yeah if everyone wants to see it. Miz says he wasn’t 100% and Lashley should want to face Miz at full strength!
Drew McIntyre interrupts as the WWE Raw Recap rolls on.
Drew wants to congratulate him, it’s been a long time coming. 16 years. Drew says he knows something about that, he had a 17 year journey. Opportunities kept passing the both of them by as they were outworking everyone else. Years keep passing them by until they weren’t even in WWE anymore. But they made it back and scratched and clawed to the top, says he knows how good it feels when he finally got that title. Says he got to the finish line, beating 29 other men in the Rumble and beat Lesnar at WrestleMania. And Lashley… well he screwed him over but get to the top however.
MVP starts cutting in but Drew keeps cutting him off. Asks why he’s even here, what is the point of their relationship when Lashley can talk for himself now? Lashley says he should worry about him. Miz says he should worry about him as well. McIntyre says he will turn his back on him and finish his conversation and Miz can either try to attack him – which he doesn’t recommend – or run for his life. McIntyre promises to beat the hell out of Miz tonight, get revenge on Sheamus at Fastlane and end the Almighty Era at WrestleMania. Calls Bobby a bitch to ensure that this is, in fact, a WrestleMania main event feud.
Heels work together to attack McIntyre and weaken them, Miz seems ecstatic to see him down on the mat. Miz mounts him for shots to the face and MVP watches and laughs as Lashley walks up the ramp only for Sheamus to jump him on the stage!
After a commercial break, we hear from Sheamus backstage who talks about being sick of hearing excuses. Tonight he will show McIntyre that he’ll be the one to take the title from Lashley. Next up on the WWE Raw Recap is our opener…
The Miz vs. Drew McIntyre
McIntyre takes a while to recover before they allow the bell to ring. Miz pounces on him until McIntyre fights back and batters him around the ring. Glasgow Kiss lays him out, big body shots drop him. McIntyre pulls him out of the ring, LOUD chop cracks his chest. Throws him into the ring, follows, Morrison grabs McIntyre’s ankle. Ref yells at him but doesn’t eject him for some reason. John throws his sunglasses in the ring for reasons. McIntyre stomps them and crushes them. Miz jumps him from behind. Miz pounds him a bit until the Inverted Alabama Slam reverses things.
McIntyre stalking for the Claymore but Morrison pulls Miz out of the ring to make the save.
THIS time the ref ejects him and they don’t properly simulate the massive pop this always gets very well at all. Commercial break, WWE Raw Recap will return when we come back. Miz with a Snap DDT as we come back, 1 count. Skull Crushing Finale countered with an arm drag, series of clotheslines, big Overhead Belly To Belly. Aaand another. Neckbreaker, kip-up! Man that piped in “Drew” chant sounds bad, glad they won’t need it for much longer.
Drew goes out there and slams Miz into the barricade repeatedly, slaps him across the face. Takes the time to reset the count and slams Miz repeatedly into the steps now. McIntyre throws Miz into the ring, he is staggering and stumblin’ now. Drew ducks a wild clothesline, Future Shock DDT plants him! McIntyre stalks once more. Claymore for the academic win. Except, no, he doesn’t cover him, he’s not done punishing him. McIntyre pulls Miz up, points at the WrestleMania sign and then hooks him in the Hurt Lock! Miz has to tap out!
Winner: Drew McIntyre
Making him look strong as always, no harm there, neat finish.
Braun Strowman again calls out Shane McMahon, great, let’s get a sequel to this goddamn segment. Shane says Braun always wants something from him, what does he want now? Braun says people have always called him stupid. Just because he didn’t grow up in a mansion, that doesn’t mean he’s not smart. Shane again tells us that he’d NEVER insult anybody. Braun says he came out and apologized but we know the McMahons never apologize for anything. Shane makes some dumb joke about a flatline iunno I don’t feel like focusing. Braun says he wanted to say something. Thinks he wanted to challenge him to a match, dares him. Shane yells that Braun couldn’t handle him. Calls him stupid in various cliche ways. Says if he wants Brains vs. Braun, he’s on, tonight. Sure, of course that’s a thing, right.
R-Truth backstage making Stone Cold jokes because tomorrow is 3/16 Day.
Women’s tag champs come out for the next match on the WWE Raw Recap.
Naomi & Lana vs. Mandy Rose & Dana Brooke
Dana I think with a shoulder block on Naomi. Naomi slides under a kick, back kick. Mandy tags in I think, Naomi with some high kicks. Leaps at Rose but she catches her, Fallaway Slam! They’re in control until Lana tags in, series of clotheslines. Bulldog to Rose. Neckbreaker for a 2 count, Dana breaks it up. Naomi comes in, Brooke with a whip, Double Flapjack on Naomi! Mandy with a snap suplex on Lana. Asuka’s music hits, Shayna and Nia on commentary aren’t happy as she comes out. They fight on the ramp. Meanwhile in the ring, Lana takes over again but Dana with a Flip Neckbreaker for the win.
Winner: Mandy Rose & Dana Brooke
I was a bit distracted during that my apologies. Didn’t seem like Asuka’s distraction meant a ton to the match but I’ve seen more than enough distraction finishes for a lifetime so that’s okay.
New Day palling around with Riddle backstage, he vows to get them matching scooters yay. Xavier and Kofi out for our next match when the WWE Raw Recap returns.
WWE Raw Tag Team Championships: The Hurt Business (c) vs. Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods
Cedric and Xavier start out. Alexander with a single leg. Woods grabs a chinlock, pulls him up into a side headlock. Cedric fights out, reverses into a double wristlock. Woods slips into a side headlock once more. Cedric takes over the headlock, Woods shoots him off, Cedric with a shoulder block. Leap frogs from Woods, Cedric responds with one of his own, Woods wants a German, Cedric reverses only for Woods to roll him into a pinning predicament for 2, big arm drag and arm wringer. Kofi tags in and takes over until Shelton tags in, Cedric Monkey Flips Kofi into a MASSIVE Spinebuster from Shelton! Cover for a nearfall. Shelton with a pump knee takes Woods to the floor, heels isolating Kofi in the corner now.
Shelton sends Xavier into the steps as Cedric keeps stomping on Kofi. Cedric takes Kingston up top, Kofi fires back. Flying Double Stomp clips him! Lunging tag to Xavier, series of clotheslines on Cedric. Whip reversed, ducks a line, Rolling Heel Kick. Reverses a Shelton whip into a Discus Forearm to drop him, puts Cedric in the ropes for a dropkick to the back! Pulls him up for a suplex, Alexander knees his way free but an elbow drops him. Cedric powders, New Day with Stereo Topes but Hurt Business are ready, catch them out of the air, Kofi gets thrown into the steps as Woods gets tossed onto the announce table!
Commercial break, WWE Raw Recap will return when the show does.
Exchange of forearms between Xavier and Cedric as we come back. Woods nails a big charging one, Cedric responds with a lariat! They are firing back and forth strong style here. Cedric with a knee to the gut, grabs him by the hair, whip, HUGE Michinoku Driver for a nearfall! He might be the best in the business at that specific move. Shelton and Kofi tag back in, Benjamin with a big lariat for a nearfall. Kofi with a flying rana, Double Stomp to the chest! Cover for a 2 count. Shelton with a biiiig Pancake, Kofi fires back with a sudden SOS for a nearfall!
Kofi clapping for the Trouble In Paradise. Ducked, Shelton charges, Kofi with a boot up. Kingston up top. Shelton leaps up there, SUPER ARM DRAG! Woods rushes in to break up the count! Low bridges Cedric to the apron when he charges him, WWE Headkick takes him to the floor, slinks through the ropes for a Tornado DDT on the floor!! Kofi ducks a line, Trouble In Paradise to Shelton! Tag to Xavier, Trust Fall to Cedric! Woods plants Shelton, tag back to Kofi, Daybreak for the win!
Winners: The New Day
Awesome TV match as we’ve come to expect from these two. Got no idea why you had to change the titles here though, just feels a bit random. I liked Shelton and Cedric with the titles really but oh well. Atleast Hurt Business got to be draped in gold for just a little bit.
AJ Styles and Omos come out to interrupt the celebration. AJ says they won the titles just in time for Mania. Well they currently have no plans for WrestleMania. AJ says he’s held all sorts of titles, even fought the Undertaker! His bucket list is getting low. But Omos had a great idea, Omos says the two of them should be Raw tag team champions! New Day point out that they’re not really a tag team but AJ says they are now. They officially challenge them for the titles at Mania.
Kofi asks if they’re even registered as a team, do they even know how to work as a team? Xavier tells Omos if he wants the match, he’s got it.
As the WWE Raw Recap, backstage, Damien Priest and Bad Bunny confront The Miz and John Morrison.
They mock Miz for his recent failings. Miz says Bad Bunny wishes he had a fraction of his success. Tells Priest he’s off to a great start but what titles and awards has he won? Priest says it will take a minute to emulate his accomplishments, why not start right now? They scare Miz and Morrison off. R-Truth appears again and he still wants the 24/7 title, gives Bunny box to put his Grammy in, in exchange. Bunny says he respects him and the business, thinks he does deserve it more than him. Hands it to him. Truth is ecstatic, Priest asks him to say Bunny’s name correctly and he does! Kind of a cute moment I guess. Priest and Bunny leave, the 24/7 crew chases Truth away.
Jakson Ryker vs. Damian Priest
Priest grapples with him, Broken Arrow sends him flying. Pulls him up, Hit The Lights, and that’s that.
Winner: Damian Priest
Well that was decisive. Elias jumps Priest afterwards and wants to hit him with a guitar but Bad Bunny grabs it from his hands! Elias hoists Bunny up to slam him but Bunny slips free and nails him in the face! Now Elias turns around into a Bellclap from Priest, Hit The Lights nailed!
Morrison goes to the ramp to distract them afterwards, Miz nails Bad Bunny with the guitar off-screen, lovely. And it doesn’t break and it actually kinda looks like it hurt, wonderful.
Backstage MVP yells that the Almighty Era has begun and they’ll be damned if Sheamus thinks he can blindside the WWE Champion and embarrass him. Sheamus says Drew McIntyre won’t be 100% at Fastlane, well after tonight Sheamus won’t be either. The same thing happens to Sheamus tonight that happens to McIntyre at WrestleMania.
And now… Shane in the ring for his match with Braun Strowman. Awesome.
Out comes Braun as well, Shane powders and is on the mic again. Dammit. Says this isn’t every day for him, he needs a little warm up. Does some jogging in place, some push ups. Jumping jacks. Braun says he’s just prolonging the ass-whooping. Shane says he has something set up for him since he talked about school. He does a little hopscotch on an actual hopscotch block. Shane says it can even help Braun learn to count. Strowman rushes out of the ring and after a bit of a chase he grabs Shane, tossing him around, big kick to the chest sends him flying.
Braun starts running all around the ring for the big Strowman Express but Shane grabs a camera from a cameraman and smashes him in the face as he comes by! Slams it onto his head. Repeatedly nails him with it until Strowman is laid out on the announce table. Shane goes up top, Flying Elbow puts him through the table.
Shane reaches under the ring and grabs a bucket of… stuff. He empties it over Braun’s body. He has slimed him. Braun Strowman has been slimed. And Shane looks under the ring and gets a second bucket of slime and empties that over him too.
This feud is garbage and I already want it to be over.
Alexa Bliss on the swings once more.
As the WWE Raw Recap rolls on, Alexa talks about her favorite game. The game of truth. Says if Randy wants her out of his life so badly, he’ll have to take her out of it. Says this Sunday at Fastlane, he has the chance. Will he take it? She cackles.
Up next on the WWE Raw Recap…
WWE Raw Women’s Champion Asuka vs. Shayna Baszler (Non-Title)
Champs try and jump Asuka before the bell but she nails both of them, knocks Nia out of the ring, Shayna whips her and Asuka slips between the ropes but Baszler nails her with a Pump Knee to the face, targeting the jaw! Asuka yells and rallies but Shayna keeps pounding on her until she rolls her over and pounds her back. Cross-Armbreaker, Nia slips onto the apron and Asuka dropkicks her away. Flying dropkick off the apron to the back! Asuka rolls back inside, Shayna with a Kirifuda Clutch but Asuka quickly reverses, Asukalock, no Shayna reverses right back, Asuka backflips to stack her up for the pin!
Asuka gets the three but Shayna keeps the hold on until Asuka fades.
Goes for a punt but Asuka was playing possom and she catches the foot! Leghook Exploder, Buzzsaw Kick! Asuka grabs Shayna’s wrist and Curbstomps her into the bottom turnbuckle! Asuka takes the pad off and rips off Shayna’s mouthguard! Now Asuka makes Shayna bite down on the exposed steel, geeze! Now she grabs the wrists again! Trying for the stomp but the ref gets in the way and stops this.
Ali yelling at Retribution about doing what they can’t tonight, Riddle whizzes by casually on his scooter.
Up next on the WWE Raw Recap…
WWE United States Championship: Riddle (c) vs. Mustafa Ali
Ali with a kick to the gut, uppercut to the face. Riddle with a big chop. Ali wants a whip, Riddle is blocking it. Ali with some forearms, Riddle ducks a line, Gutwrench Suplex! PK takes Ali to the floor. The two of them wrestle on the apron. Riddle pulls Ali up to his feet, Ali with a throat thrust! NECKBREAKER TO THE FLOOR! Yipes! Commercial break, WWE Raw Recap will resume when the show does!
When we come back, Ali bounces Riddle off the buckles for a neckbreaker, 2 count. Ali with some elbows. Mustafa slips out of the way of a corner charge, Roll-Through Neckbeaker for a 2 count! Riddle with a series of palm strikes, Pele Kick! Charging forearm, Exploder Suplex, big Broton! Fisherman’s Buster for a nearfall! Ali with a big enziguri, O’Connor Roll, T-Bar distracted the ref and ended up costing Ali I think as he reversed the cover. Riddle with the Bro Derek for the win.
Nice but sadly short match, Ali yells at his troops again as you’d expect.
Drew McIntyre out again, he had the opening match and I guess he’s got the main event too.
He makes some jokes about showing up again and not showering in the past two hours. Talks about him and Sheamus loved beating the hell out of other when they were friends so of course they love it now. Promises to take Sheamus out on the last bump in the road to WrestleMania. He also waits in the ring as Bobby Lashley comes out and they stand face-to-face.
WWE Championship: Bobby Lashley (c) vs. Sheamus
Big hosses come to blows immediately. Lashley with an ugly spinebuster. Lashley grinding against Sheamus, forearms to the face. Sheamus fights up slowly. Lashley takes him into the corner and clobbers him, grinds elbow into his face. Whip from one corner to the other, Sheamus with an elbow off a charge. Lashley with a leapfrog, clothesline drops Sheamus. Big suplex, Sheamus spills to the floor. Lashley follows, drags him across the outside and gets right in McIntyre’s face as he watches seated on a chair. Powers Sheamus up, he slips free and tries to post him but Lashley reverses! Takes him into the ring but Sheamus kicks him as he re-enters.
Sheamus drags Lashley to his feet, shots to the lower back. Ten Beats of the Bowery surely soon to come. And here they are- no, Bobby blocks the very first one, fights back but a lariat drops him to the floor! Lashley does land on his feet though. Sheamus off the apron with a flying clothesline but Lashley catches him out of the air and hits an Exploder onto the floor! Drew rises to his feet and him and Lashley come face-to-face again.
Commercial break, WWE Raw Recap will resume when the show does.
Lashley grinding on Sheamus as we come back. He takes him outside and bashes him into the barrier. Takes him into the ring. Bobby batters him in the corner. Sheamus side steps a corner charge and he gets sent right to the floor. Takes him inside, flying clothesline. Lashley fights back but a sidestep sends him to the outside once again in front of McIntyre. Lashley climbing back in, Sheamus hot shots him. Ten Beats of the Bowery ensue. Pulls Lashley inside, Irish Curse Backbreaker for a 1 count! Bobby takes control with a Powerslam! Comes back with a lariat. Whip, Sheamus with a boot off a back body drop, Lashley avoids the Brogue Kick, Flatliner for a nearfall! Lashley takes Sheamus up top and after some fighting he nails a Superplex! Stalking for the Spear. Pump knee to the face! White Noise for a nearfall! Wants a Brogue but Lashley Spears him mid-charge and gets the pin!
Winner: Bobby Lashley
Puts the Hurt Lock on Sheamus to try and put him out. McIntyre into the ring. Lashley is distracted momentarily when Sheamus grabs MVP’s ankle, McIntyre nails Lashley with a Claymore! And that’s the show.